My mom and why I started this website
When I first conceived of this website, my mom lived in Florida, while I lived in the Midwest. Like many people my age, I was worried about my mother living alone. She had family nearby, but my cousins had their own lives and their own parents who needed care. Due to the realities of life, it wasn't feasible for her to move in with me nor I could move near her. I had a professional job I couldn't easily replace elsewhere. She had family ties and community resources that supported her without my help. However, I knew this situation would not last forever and she would need more care soon.
This fear materialized during the Covid pandemic. Now, having outside helpers coming to her home meant having risky exposures. My sister and I decided that the best approach was to bring her and her older sister to stay with us until the pandemic subsided. The idea was to have them stay with us a month or two and then switch. The difficulty was that we lived in different states and switching back and forth required a 10-hour road trip, that turned into a two day trip due to their needs. This worked for several turns but then my mom's condition changed when she sustained a fracture that could not be corrected by surgery. We also noticed that changing their living environment was affecting their mental status, accelerating dementia symptoms.
Eventually, caring for them became an all-day long responsibility. This, on top of our professions and other family needs, became too much to handle. We found an assisted living facility near my sister's home and moved them in. Thanks to the pandemic, my job changed to a work-from-home arrangement that allowed me to relocate to help with their care. Now, my sister and I take turns visiting them every day. Our main goal is that they receive the best possible care and feel safe and loved.
Like me, there are many other middle-aged people who have professional and family responsibilities, who also have aging parents in need of care. This website could serve as a resource for information and ideas to help them make decisions during this period. I hope that by basing those decisions on data, people will have peace of mind.